Batteries are important for yourself more so than they are for anyone else. It is essential for you to think about the things that bother you, upset you or even those things that make you happy in an unhealthy way. Then set those boundaries for other people and yourself to prevent lack of self discipline for yourself and for others to be disciplined around you.
Putting healthy boundaries in place actually allows you to practice self-care. It is essential to maintain your self care mentally and in particular so that you can maintain healthy relationships with other people. It allows you to not feel guilty or selfish about things that you should not feel guilty or selfish about. It allows you to still have autonomy over your well-being and over your time and energy. It keeps you from hitting that burn out place that a lot of us have found ourselves in by trying to be that responsible person for someone else.
A few examples of healthy batteries for example below.
Let's say you have a best friend and this best friend is consistently complaining about their partner. You know the partner is bad for them and you're trying to help your friend out. You're answering the phone anytime they have a rough patch. Now you've noticed they have no limit to when they're calling. The calls are coming in at anytime such as when you're sleeping, at work, or having down time that you deem essential for your well-being. when they're having a bad moment with their partner. A boundary that you may want to sit with your friend is it's okay so call me I want to be there to help you however I need you to call me between these hours only. This allows you to still be there for them but to not interrupt your essential time that you need for yourself.
Other boundaries that you can set will be for yourself. Let's say you have a habit of eating too many sweets and you noticed that your blood sugar may be higher than normal. A boundary that you may want to set for yourself is instead of snacking on unhealthy snacks like candy pies and cakes. Instead you may want to keep healthier snacks like almonds fruits and vegetables around. Still allow yourself to maybe eat a sweeter too once or twice a week. However maintaining a more healthier balance in your diet will help to bring that blood sugar down. Creating a boundary around what you can have will help your physical and mental well-being.
Having standards is a placeholder for what you expect out of life from other people and yourself and is also crucial for maintaining healthy relationships. Standards are always set in a professional circumstance but are never set and personal relationships. This is one of the biggest mistakes we can make as humans because if we have standards for how someone treats us in a professional atmosphere so that we have the most pleasurable experience working for someone why should we not have those same standards for personal relationship. There is nothing wrong with clarifying your expectations. Especially those that come from a heartfelt place rather than shallow intentions. Standards can go hand in hand with your boundaries to create the logistic aspect of expectation.
An example of healthy standards is listed below.
You made a new partner someone that you've been dating for a few months. You noticed that this person has a certain aspect of laziness about them. Then in the middle of you dating they get laid off. You see that they're just living off of their unemployment and not taking the initiative to go out and find a job. So you decide to end the relationship before it becomes too serious. You have now set a standard that you do not want somebody that depends on ungaranteed money and not trying to create new income because they want to be lazy. This is a healthy standard
Always remember that your standards and your boundaries are set by you. No one can tell you that they're right or wrong as long as they are not harming anyone. Analyze what you are once and needs are in life to make you happy and mentally healthy. Then Implement your standards and boundaries accordingly
SIGNING OFF - Virtuous Woman
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